After all was said and done...I go back to basics!

Today I reflected on my previous postings, and to tell you the truth, I had a more of a delightful time reading my episodes of good deeds more than anything else. So going back to my previous intentions, let me tell you about my current random act of kindness.

In light of my dad's passing my mother has been scared to stay home alone by herself. Call it fear of ghost or whatever you want but she does not want to be alone. Completely understandable. However, if you read my previous posting, I too am grieving for more than one reasons. But as her daughter, I have to put that aside and make sure that my mom is ok.

Looking forward to a peaceful evening in a lonely bedroom to sulk in my own pathetic sorrow, I give that up to make sure my mother is not alone and make ready to spend the night at her house (keeping in mind that I just got done hosting my relatives in my house for a whole week). I felt like screaming to the top of my lungs to leave me alone, I need time to mourn. Ahhh!

Well, here's what I'm concluding to, I've been looking forward to a breakdown that isn't coming, looking forward to a melt down, but for some reason, I'm doing pretty well. Could it be that I'm not the same person as I use to be and I'm sitting here expecting the worse and the worse that I use to know isn't anymore..if that makes any sense.

Maybe the same girl that use to handle these is better equipped to handle these situations and I just didn't know it. I sat here waiting for the worst "me" to take over but low and behold, I'm ok.


So, if that is true, then thank you Lord for preparing me for such occasions. Please, don't misunderstand, I am very much heart broken, but I think I'm a little bit more mature than I use to be. I was more afraid of dealing with the pain than the pain itself. Like riding a roller coaster...afraid of the ride but once you're in it, you realize it's not so bad.


Huh!? Interesting!

Thank you for reading,
Millie